Bittersweet

Finally, finally the house is done.  The photographer came by today & my realtor says that the house looks great & she's not worried at all about selling.  It also helps that a house up the street just went under contract--no direct competition now.  It has been a long journey to get this house ready & as I looked around when the photographer was snapping pictures, I just couldn't believe the transformation. Wow.  But now it is the beginning of another journey--one of people traipsing through my home, poking into closets, & picking apart all the little problems--I just hope that a nice family or a young couple who wants to start a family buys this house & begins to raise their family here like I did mine.  This entire process has been bittersweet--this is really the only home my son knows & it's where I've raised him--with his best friends up the street & around the corner--and mine too.  

It's bittersweet, more sweet than bitter, bitter than sweet
It's a bitter sweet, surrender
It's bittersweet, more sweet than bitter, bitter than sweet,
It's a bitter sweet, surrender
--Big Head Todd & The Monsters


On the other hand, a new & wonderful journey is beginning with a man & his own family that I couldn't have imagined when I started writing this blog.  He is my best friend & it is with him that I want to build my future.  It is exciting & scary all at once.  I've been on my own in this house for 7 years now...making my own decisions, choosing my own decorative touches, art, etc.,--bittersweet.   Now I have to negotiate & compromise--but I want to & that is all the difference.


This weekend was spent with last minute projects around the house--buying rugs, plants, mulch, & a new comforter set for my bed.  Xing Fu & my son planted a rhododendron bush & mulched the flower beds in the front of the house while I went shopping for rugs, etc.  On Sunday we relaxed, watched NCAA basketball--great SLU v. Michigan State game.  Later we watched The Descendents starring George Clooney.   I'd seen it earlier & wanted Xing Fu to see it because it reminded me a lot of his situation in some ways.  In the course of the movie, Clooney's character rebuilds his relationships with his daughters--one that was quite superficial up until he was forced to become their primary caretaker.  The death of the mother really was secondary to the quality relationships he builds with his daughters.  I wanted Xing Fu to see that through that loss, Clooney creates a much closer, & interactive connections with his girls--much what I see with Xing Fu & his girls.  Good can come from bad.  I hope that he sees that.  It is also bittersweet.