Thursday, October 7, 2010

Just Friends--Part II

Which brings us to Xing Fu.  We were also friends first and for quite some time.  That is not to say that my initial attraction to him wasn't there--it was--I asked about him soon after I met him.  But, because he was married, & I have a rule--NO MARRIED MEN, there was no way anything was going to happen & therefore I was perfectly happy to be platonic sailing friends.  But certainly I have to admit that the sex thing, or at least the attraction thing, was there to even initiate a desire to be friends--so that is of note.  

An aside, Xing Fu had also been friends with another female sailing friend & had shared a room with her during a regatta weekend one year.  Purely platonic & was never cause for alarm as both of them were "off the market" as well.  And accordingly, not everyone is a slave to their baser instincts anyway.  On Slate there is reference to a Dear Prudence letter with a similar set of circumstances. Essentially, a woman writes in that her boyfriend & his platonic female friend are going share a hotel room during a conference. Problem was, the writer didn't want that to happen because she suspected a little hanky-panky might happen.  People just suspect that something will happen even if there's nothing to fear--kinda sucks because it's not always about that.  Referenced here: scroll down to see the letter   
http://www.slate.com/id/2254228/

Anyway, I digress.  With regard to Xing Fu, I would have been perfectly happy to continue as was--we certainly had much in common to be "cross-sex" friends & I was happy with that, even if I did wonder as time went on & he was a perfect gentleman in every way.  But, as circumstances changed, so did our platonic friendship--so there it is...just like in Hollywood.  And this just friends thingy--well, I'm on the fence there.



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