Monday, September 17, 2012

New Year, New Sail

Today marks another turn of a year--if you are Jewish (which I am).  It also begins the time of reflection leading up to Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement.  And so, time to reflect upon my navel--anyone who's reading this blog (all 2 of you), knows that this year has been a huge one for change--but I'm not gonna talk about being a stepmom or moving in together, although that does require reflection at some point, this post is a reflection of sailing.  Right now, this oft quoted statement really fits & quite literally too:

"When you can't change the direction of the wind--adjust your sails."

Been a tough season for me as I've stated before & recently I think things have shifted--been out on a few different boats recently & I've come to realize that I really should trust myself more--that on occasion I actually do know what I'm talking about. Of course, I'm not saying that I'm really good at what I do--I will always be learning to be better (ancora imparo), but there is no reason to feel the way I have for most of this past season: that my stomach was tied in knots anytime anyone suggested that I go out on a new boat, & that I totally sucked at this racing-sailing thing.  And when you love sailing as much as I do, imagine how awful I felt most of the summer knowing that I didn't have a regular boat, thinking that any boat that I guest crewed on would make me rail meat because I wasn't any better than that anyway, & getting my hands on the spinnaker other than mebbe pole wasn't going to happen, or so I thought.  As the summer slips away, & fall breezes pick up--there has been a change in the wind--

The Oxford race was Saturday & even though the skipper decided that he wasn't going to race (20 knot sustained wind with some 25-30 knot gusts) & we were totally bummed--we made the best of it & drove down to Oxford for the party.  That is, myself & two other folks that regularly crew on the boat that I was supposed to be on.  We met Xing Fu after the race, had a blast at the party, went to a great dinner at Latitude 38, & then drove back to Annapolis.  But all was not lost, we all went out on Sunday & had a great sail--the moral of this is that I adjusted my sails & made the best of it--made some great new friends along the way, & got to play with my sail (the spinnaker).  I also have come to realize that I should trust myself when racing--that although I'm no rock star sailor, I can hold my own, would be an asset to many boats because I'm able to fill in for most jobs while racing(just don't put me on foredeck--I can do it but I'm no skinny minnie), & sometimes I actually do know what I'm talking about--jib foot is strapped, outhaul too tight...for example.  I think the epiphany came when one of our new friends (and a very soul sister vibe) said to me as we were leaving her house yesterday evening that she was impressed at how chill Xing Fu & I were flying the kite--we were both sitting with our backs to the rail, me on the sheet & him on pole & just kinda hangin' out, talking to each other & the driver about how shifty the wind was--making the necessary adjustments, & having fun making the boat go.  For me, trimming the kite is a very zen place--when that sail fills & you feel that catch, well, for me, it is nirvana--words just cannot describe it.  And that is what I mean about reflection--I am back to where I want to be~~my deep, love of sailing & desire to race & learn to be even better--adjust the sails & all of a sudden things look much better--L'Shana Tova everyone!


rkeats said...

Great post. We are all very proud of you and what you accomplished this year. Never let the fear of striking out prevent you from playing the game. You are fearless and a role model. Even if you don't see yourself as being one, those around you do. XXOO

Lynn Crosby said...

Thanks! Couldn't ask for better support!
XXOO back atcha'!