Friday, November 2, 2012

Rookie Mistake

“Stepfamilies, too, fall victim TO THEIR OWN VERSION OF PARTISAN POLITICS. By virtue of coming into a family once formed and since dissolved, a stepmother, in many ways, has the odds stacked against her.”  ~STACY SPENCER THOMPSON  Stepmom Magazine

Ok, so it seems that I’ve made a mistake.  Here’s the story:  My BFF(J) plays guitar with a few folks & is performing at a Woodhall Winery  tonight.  On Tuesday she asked if Xing Fu & I wanted to go see her performance at the winery.  I told her that I’d find out what was going on this weekend & get back to her—I knew that Xing Fu’s daughters would be there this weekend but one would be away & the other has a very active social life so I was pretty sure she’d be out with her friends too & we wouldn’t see her for a good portion of the weekend as usual.  I came home on Tuesday after picking my kid up with the skids already there & said to Xing Fu that BFF(J) wanted us to come see her play Friday night.  Somehow, that translated to one step daughter as, “Get lost, we don’t want you around on Friday!”  Not sure how that happened exactly because that certainly wasn’t my message or intent.  It was more like, “I know that usually everyone is doing something Friday night—out with friends, etc., so why don’t we go support my BFF(J) at a cool winery?”  So my assumption was incorrect, but usually it is true—most of the offspring have something planned & often Xing Fu & I are alone on Friday evenings. So now I feel like an evil stepmother & I guess they think that I don’t want them around—not true.  I suppose from now on I need to not make innocent announcements out loud in front of the skids in case they get offended & skew my intent.  If this were a normal family dynamic, it would never have mattered.  When will I learn?  It wasn’t intentional but I guess I’m punished now.  When you look outside in the backyard—that’s me in the doghouse.  Bad stepmother!  Bad!

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