Been a few weeks since we've moved in & I think we're off to a good start--adjustments, adjustments, alterations, detours & the like--kinda like knitting (my sis would love this)sometimes you gotta rip it out & start again. This is not easy & I think I've said this a few times before--but my philosophy is this: Nothing in Life is worthwhile if it comes too easy--you appreciate those things that you work hard to achieve. I get the impression that both of us want that--in fact, beside the whole love aspect, the fact that we are both committed to figuring all of this out despite the road blocks, frustrations, adjustments, & alterations, is a pretty strong message to the world: We are in it for the duration even if sometimes it don't exactly look like it. And I'm sure that we sometimes scare the bejeezes outta our kiddos cuz' all of 'em are most certainly gun shy after divorce--even if it was 7 years ago in the case of my BS (Biological Son). We don't see eye to eye on some things & rather than keep it all in & not communicate & just build resentment, we let it out (or I do). Which brings me to Cookie Monster. http://www.slate.com/articles/life/low_concept/2012/06/what_kind_of_muppet_are_you_chaos_or_order_.html
I just read a wonderful little article in Slate that talks about whether you are a "Chaos Muppet" or an "Order Muppet". This article by Dhalia Lithwick is priceless. So if you are a chaos muppet (think Cookie Monster, Ernie, Grover, Oscar, et al.) then you live your life a little bit like "seat of the pants" philosophy. Yeah, an emotional, with the tags hanging out whirlwind. One example in the article talks about your spice cabinet. Which is so freakin' funny to me because as we set up house (and anyone who knows me knows how I LOVE to cook & have a million spices), one of our little issues is, in fact, the spice cabinet. In the article Lithwick talks about organization & alphabetizing of the spices--if you just throw 'em in there then chances are you are a chaos muppet. Hmmmm....guess that explains a lot. I think a Chaos Muppet's arguing with the SO technique is bombastic rather than staid. But I will do things for cookies...
An "Order Muppet" as you might guess, thrives on regimentation, & structure. They are "...averse to surprises and may
sport monstrously large eyebrows. They sometimes resent the
responsibility of the world weighing on their felt shoulders, (ah, weltschmerz)but they
secretly revel in the knowledge that they keep the show running. Your first grade teacher was probably an Order Muppet." Think Bert, Scooter, & Kermit for good examples. One question Xing Fu had for me was how did I want to arrange my spices? My response was just to throw them in there--loosely organized around which ones I used more often. In his old condo, Xing Fu had a spice rack with all of the spices neatly labeled. "Order Muppet" anyone? And arguing stye is definitely more stoic than I. But, the key to success is the following: " It’s simply the case that the key to a happy marriage, a
well-functioning family, and a productive place of work lies in
carefully calibrating the ratio of Chaos Muppets to Order Muppets within
any closed system." So, there you have it folks--in the perfect sense of opposites attract. We just need to calibrate our relationship & our blended family into the best blend of Muppet Typology and from there it's a piece of cake...er, cookie.