Saturday, January 30, 2010

Boyfriend? Please....

Very informal poll taken at work yesterday. Decided to try to figure out another name for boyfriend. Afterall, when you're in your 40s having a "boyfriend" just seems rather puerile. Soooo, I asked my co-workers for their opinions. And this is what I got:

"He's your Boo." Um, no.

"Your complication." OK, well, complicated is certainly true so that could work. This came from my co-worker who explained that in her relationship she needed a 12-step extrication program. My complication ain't that complicated....

Another co-worker said that when she was a kid, she & her sister would answer the phone & when the caller asked for their mom they'd say that "she was in a business meeting." Having sex=business meeting...

Of course the ubiquitous, "that's my Lover." Always with the emphasis as "lovah" circa a 1970s porn flick. And it connotes a sleezy kind of connection--not an honest relationship...

This isn't going too well...

"my guy"
"close friend"
"significant other"

"partner" Most people felt that was used in the Gay community & meant that I was a lesbian...

So far, not what I wanted. Why are we so short on appropriate replacement words for 'boyfriend'?

Most people were of the opinion that the best one was "this is my man." Problem is: I don't like it.

The ones I did like were "my boy-toy"--I like it because it is so obviously a joke that it just eases everyone & diverts away from the awkward use of boyfriend at my age.

And: "sparring partner"--reference to TKD.

Finally: BF. That works cuz it implies boyfriend without actually saying it. Plus it works on Facebook, Twitter, texting, emailing.....all "the portals" as said in He's Just Not That Into You.

But none of them are 100% right--of course my kid always says "My mom's new boyfriend is coming over later" to his friends so it is a natural label in his mind. I hope he wouldn't say "boy-toy".

So Boyfriend, Please! it is.


rkeats said...

My MIL always referred to me as his "Special Friend" until I became the fiance, wife...etc. Me, I would go with this is...[his name] thus not assigning ownership of said person because it is creepy or if you feel the need associate him with you, a dear friend of mine refers to her live-in not as "my boyfriend" but just boyfriend as in "Boyfriend just made pasta for the party" or "Boyfriend took off on a 2000 mile trip across the heartland and won't be back for 10 days so why don't we go out and party while he is away."

Worrier King said...

Ooo! There's finally a topic low enough on the sensitivity scale for me to feel comfortable offering a comment. I've always liked 'companion'.

So glad things are going well with you and your companion!