Yesterday a friend of mine posted a link to this article on facebook entitled:
If A Man Wants You by Salma Rumman.
Such truisms were never said better. In fact the first statement really says it all: "If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away".
How true. I've read that all over the dating advice sites, books like He's Just Not That Into You, & Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man, & just about any guy friend I quizzed. The advice also applies beyond the man having finally decided that he wants you--it's also how he treats you & how you allow him to treat you.
As I looked at these statements & reviewed my dating life before Xing Fu & cringed a bit because I so recognized my behavior. I allowed so many ill-mannered behaviors, but I think as one of my friends said, "Those guys were part of your transition team." Yes, they were--because now I know & expect to be treated with respect & not make the excuses, & concessions for poor behavior. I really hope that my friend who originally posted this article to facebook follows the advice & prepares herself for the great guy I know is out there for her & only her. And, I absolutely agree with the article that dating is fun--it most certainly can be, if you relax & let it. I think I'll label this advice "Intelligent Dating".
I also loved this article for recognizing & reminding me about the great guy I have now--he sometimes infuriates me, confounds & confuses me, but he does seem to encompass most of what I am looking for--almost two years out, in my partner. And as the article states, "Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything you need." So not an issue--woohoo!
But the best statement for the already committed (heh, committed=crazy?) is, "You should not be doing all the bending...compromise is a two-way street." Compromise, Communication, & Cuddling--the 3 C's. YUP.