Camp Days

Every year my kid escapes for a month.  With his best friend in the world.  What boy doesn't want that?  He & his "bro" talk about camp all year long--I'm happy that he is able to do it & loves it this much.  I think it is very good for him as an only child too. (Not really--he has a "brother" and a younger "sister")  Boy do I miss him.  I said this about my beach week--I missed him not being part of that--but I digress.  Parenting has changed a lot since I went to camp.  

This post was triggered by an email from my sister--she'd forwarded her daughter's "Weekly Camp Report".  As I'd forwarded my son's.  Yup--when I was in camp there was no such thing as a camp report--my impression was that the less my parents knew about what I doing or how I was doing at camp the better.  Camp was the black hole of parenting back then.  Send the kid down to North Carolina on a plane & wave bye-bye for the summer.  "Parent Party-time!!  WOOHOO!!  No Kids!!"   Well, that's my impression of it.   How times have changed!  Now every week I receive a letter from my kid's camp telling me what he's been up to--he even has to write a section.  I love, Love, LOVE this.  Since my son's letters are sporadic and sketchy at best (good, that means he's having a blast), this serves as a way to really know what's up.   When did camps start this?  Or have they always done it & I'm just being let in on the secret now.  Meh.  Is it a result of the "Helicopter Parent" syndrome?  Does that make me a Helicopter Parent?? ACK!!  I'm developing a complex....

Nah...I'm just interested in my son's life--  :)

Truth be told--I also like having time off being a parent--call it a bit of "Parent Respite Care".  By the time I get kinda used to not having him around, he comes home & I realize how much I'm glad that I'm being a mom again.

Happy Frogs

Cape Henlopen State Park

Yikes!  Where did the time go?  I just spent the last week at the beach with Xing Fu & 2 of his kids.  I'm learning how to be "stepmom".  And contrary to what I've been reading & at this point, have stopped reading, things seem to be going quite well. Now don't get me wrong--it's not all flowers & butterflies all the time, & I did have moments of aggravation, but overall our beach week was a success on many levels. It was another test of a sort.  Not necessarily Xing Fu testing me, well maybe just a little,  always a question about how good the fit with his kids.  (Me too with my son--but I've long since decided that was not needed at all.)  But the grrr moments were very few & far in between & I think we all walked away feeling pretty good about the week.  Yay us!  I still think about some of the advice in the Stepmother books, & try to be realistic about it all. And recently I've been reviewing my own stepmothers' performances (my one stepmom is only 9 years older than me...HUGE issue when I was growing up--mega teenage 'tude, ya' know?) ) & my mom's stepmother performance to sorta bounce the way I'm doing the step thing off of theirs.  My mom has told me how impressed she is--great--the true test is how Xing Fu's kids feel & he says that they felt it was a great week so there it is.

Xing Fu wrote me an email this morning telling me that he's a Happy Frog.  One of our sailing friends dubbed him a Happy Frog a few months ago--we now talk about that--I've asked him at different times if he's a "Happy Frog".  At Screwpile, our skipper bought a smiling frog wind whirligig thingy & we tied it to the backstay where it grinned down at us until the first gybe--blew off his whirligig.  Actually, the whole frog was left & he continued grinning at us the rest of the regatta. So I must be the princess who kissed the frog--a reference to kissing a ton of frogs when I was dating--lucky me--it took a while but good karma is good karma.

It's continuing to be a good summer--now to get through the next two weeks until my kiddo comes back from camp--he was definitely missed on our beach trip but there's always next year.

Screwpile-Year Dos

We've been anticipating this regatta since summer began--it officially marks the halfway point of the sailing season (that's a bummer) & is a 3 day regatta down on Solomon's Island.  This year my skipper was away so we had a guest skipper with most of the regular crew plus 3 others (Xing Fu) was one.  Our skipper was from Puerto Rico & occasionally there was a little language barrier--it was actually rather cute & she was so optimistic despite never cracking the top 10 (there were 16 in our PHRF B fleet) that it was just nice to sail with her.  We had three days of pretty flukey wind too.  Only the last day did we have the expected "no wind on the Chesapeake" so abandon race problem & for the most part there was pretty decent air for a change.  And on our first race we were about a minute and a half late for the start--unlike last year the Race Committee did not have a gun, only a horn, nor did they really announce starts very loudly over the radio.  That was actually our best race--we came in 11th--crazy! But we had a great time!

Xing Fu & I did something a bit nutso--we drove back to Baltimore after the first day's races (3 total)--about a 2 hour drive from Solomon's Island & went to a concert at Pier Six--Peter Frampton.  Definitely music that Xing Fu chose-but it was fun listening to music that brought me back to my very early teens & the boy who introduced me to Frampton & the Who.  For me though, by the second set, I was sitting in my seat & nodding off.  One minute I'm listening to very good guitars & the next thing I know I'm on Bump...hearing one of my crew members telling me to trim the kite...  And then the 2 hour trip back down to Screwpile--arriving at 1AM.  Dock time 8:30 AM...you get the picture.  But it was fun, fun, fun!  (And I have a great BF--he gave me his red hat--there were only 4 in the skipper's bag & we had 8 crew.  The skipper got one & we drew for the rest.  He can be so sweet!)


And now, we are leaving for the beach on Saturday for a week.  Nonstop summer--it has been another great one so far except now my A/C is out during the hottest heat wave to hit B-more! But amazingly once the A/C guy got here, looked at the unit he saw the most amazing thing & apparently pretty rare--my A/C has been attacked by ants!  Yup, they'd crawled into the connector & prevented one part from touching another which communicated with the thermostat--thankfully a VERY easy & relatively inexpensive fix.  A/C up & running as the temps her in B-more continue to climb, climb, climb!

 

Where Did I Go?

Ok, so I've been MIA for a while--not necessarily a bad thing.  With the sailing season in full motion--Screwpile is coming up starting on Sunday--Xing Fu is sailing with Bump... which is always fun, and a bunch of parties including my buddy's (Baltimore Diary) pig roast (that I'll actually get to go to this year), a Peter Frampton concert (yeah, not my typical fare--guess whose??), my kid spending a week on the Schooner Sultana, & very shortly off for a month at summer camp, oh, & work too, I've lost track of time.   I can't believe that we're already in July & that tomorrow is my birthday!  I also can't believe that I'll be 44--I just don't feel that old....I can hear my sister now--"You are that old..."

This summer has been nonstop--just days after Screwpile, Xing Fu & I are taking off with his kids to the beach--yup, my kid will not be with us (camp).  That part will be quite strange.  But a week at the beach without my family & with my man is something new--something I've been looking forward to--I rarely take a vacation.  I think the last real vaycay was to Amsterdam two years ago--wow--it's been two years already!  I'm looking forward to a pause in the action--a time to just breathe & regroup--plus being by the ocean is always a good place for me to be.  And with Xing Fu...'nuff said.

And, contrary to all the stuff I've seen written about blending families (jealousies, obnoxious kids, the ex-factors & a thousand other nasties that I've read about), things continue to go really well with our kids & us.  I even received some texts from one of Xing Fu's kids today--for some reason that was the best affirmation that things are going well--that familiarity & comfort in being able to text me--cool.

Annapolis girl, 14, dies after boat capsizes during sailing camp

Annapolis girl, 14, dies after boat capsizes during sailing camp

This is a tragedy & a reminder that sailing can be a very dangerous sport. My heart goes out to her family.

Summer "Sailstice"

"Sail Locally, Celebrate Globally"

 

http://www.summersailstice.com/

 This weekend was a busy one as usual & it was full of sailing--of course.  Xing Fu & I were on opposite race days so on Saturday he was out there for the "Sailstice" racing on a boat designed by the skipper--they took two bullets so I guess that design is working...A bit south down in Deale, I was out with one of my teammates from Bump & one of our friends on his boat.  We were cruising--racers cruising is ALWAYS interesting & this was no different.  But I digress..."Sailstice" is a little non-profit that celebrates the summer & sailing--being out sailing around the solstice is always cool so having a little celebration & actually being out there is even better.  Xing Fu told me he would look south & think of us out there..nice.

So off we go & our skipper says that he picked up a spinnaker for free & would we like to fly it?  No twisting of arms necessary--although he wasn't sure what shape it was actually in--we soon discovered that it was an asymmetric kite & was about 20 feet too short for the boat--probably a very good J/22 spinnaker, not for a Columbia 9.6.....but being who we are, we decided to fly the thing anyway & as a symmetric kite too...at one point we considered flying it from the backstay to see if we could get the boat to go backwards....just a thought.

"The Kid" under "spinnaker"

As the wind got lighter we decided to go swimming--I'd never been dragged behind a boat under sail--2 knots--very cool--the entire day was fun & of course the company....cruising can be fun after all..


Next day back out on Bump for the AYC Annual Regatta.  The first race was a good one, the second, well, anyone who knows the Chesapeake Bay in the summer, no wind.  The second race was given three gunshots & we were done.  Despite no wind for the second race, it was good just to be out with the crew again--always fun & entertaining.  Next weekend is the Twilight Race--starts late in the day after the wind has filled in (we hope).  And as the summer progresses...Screwpile is on the horizon...summer=sailing.

Another Great Weekend

We tend to write this in an email after every weekend we spend together--obviously a very good thing but it brings me to the idea of appreciation.  I ran across a little snippet about strengthening your relationship with your significant other.  It read:

Get In Your Head

To be happy with your husband, you may have to re-train your brain, says Achor. For 21 days in a row, write down one new thing you're grateful for about your husband. "Research shows that by the end of those three weeks, you will have taught your brain to be more appreciative and loving toward your mate," she says.

We already to this to some degree is what I wrote in an email this morning.  Even if Xing Fu tries to drown me, or knock me out with the boom, he does not blow off the little advice blurbs I send him.  He treats them with respect & recognizes how much we both work to keep our relationship a strong & healthy one.  To that end I certainly appreciate the effort we both put forth--it shows a deep commitment to each other.  And we're going to give it a try without being redundant.  My first one: 

I appreciate that you treat these little relationship advice snippets that I find & send seriously & not just "humor" me.

And I wonder, looking at the recent failure of a relationship that an acquaintance of mine had blow up in her face, if we're the lucky ones.  Of course, she had it coming--hatred spewing people cannot find others who will find them positive, loving people--if you hate, you will see Karma come right back atcha'--how can you have a loving relationship with anyone when you exude such anger & negativity?

I also like to think that for the most part my friends' relationships & marriages are also ones that show deep appreciation--they seem to--this weekend demonstrated that as we all descended on BFF(J)'s house on the water for an impromptu BBQ--